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Weight Loss Woes and Learnings


My current weight loss so far has been 42 lbs. in a bit over three months. Is that good? No, it’s not good enough. But I will take it. My weight loss journey thus far has been a difficult one. I have learned a lot about myself and why I am this way. I sometimes think I have a disease of some sort: a fatso disease. I can’t seem to find the cure for it and it really gets to me sometimes. There are times when I can’t control my emotions: shame, anger, fear, sadness, hate.

My weight loss journey did not begin in August of 2007. It began several years ago. I have been attempting to lose weight for years and it’s taken it’s effect on my mind, not just my body. I have always worked out consistently and ate right, only to stop abruptly. I have been in a down state of mind over the last few weeks. I think it’s because this time of year isn’t to good for me personally, or for my weight loss for that matter. Historically I have done the best with my weight loss during Spring and Summer months. This year I am hoping to turn that around as I attempt to fall below the 300 lb mark for the first time in a while. I hope to accomplish this last 10 lb weight loss by my next weigh-in which should be coming up in the next few weeks.

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I don’t even know what my original point was for this post. I feel so scatter brained and stupid. I think I need to center myself. Does anyone have any recommendations for “centering” ones self? I could really use that. I want to get back to my up beat posts about how well things are going, but I can’t. This blog was made to share my thoughts throughout my weight loss journey and that’s what I am doing, but I feel like I have been a bit depressing and dark lately. It annoys me. Seriously. Who wants to read some fat bastard writing about how sad and depressed he feels? I don’t, that’s for sure.

I didn’t expect things to always be perfect, but seeing and reading what I live through has opened my eyes a bit. None of the things I am feeling are new. Like I said, I have been living in this weight loss process for years. It’s just that I have never actually written any of this down, so it’s hitting me hard how I need to get over the weight loss issue and be happy with myself. It’s as if I have been living under a blanket and now the blanket isn’t there to shield me.

One thing is for sure, I am glad it’s not there because it can help me see clearer…

About the Author

My name is Israel Lagares. I used to be the kind of guy that was always in shape, but over the last few years I've fallen off tremendously. This site is my final attempt to get back into shape. So far I've lost 70.4 lbs. Check out my weight loss chart, weight loss videos and progress pics. Follow my journey, those of others, and read our thoughts on various health topics. Share your thoughts, experience, and journey here on FMU.

Community Thoughts (28)

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  1. AndrewNo Gravatar says:

    Maybe you are suffering a bit from SAD. Try getting more sun or taking vitamin D.

  2. SteveNo Gravatar says:

    Don’t beat yourself buddy we all go through some rough points. This time of year is also tough for me. I think I suffer from SAD as well.

    Spring and summer have traditionally been my high points, but I’m starting to realize that those are the “show off seasons” fall and winter are where the fat is lost and the muscle is built.

    As for centering yourself, I am “trying” the meditation thing. I’ve heard so many amazing things about it (Dr. OZ says it’s the number 1 way to live a long life). I’m not really into the whole spirituality thing and I do feel like an idiot doing it. I’m not even sure that I’m doing it right? But it does seem to help me de-stress and refocus on what I want. I think that is the point of it?

    Keep plugin away and remember I’m still up for that challenge! Let me know when you are ready. πŸ™‚

    • IsraelNo Gravatar says:

      Thanks for the motivation. What’s the challenge gonna be?

      • I want to play challenge as well… πŸ™‚

        • IsraelNo Gravatar says:

          I’m just waiting on him to respond. SO thats 3 of us.

        • SteveNo Gravatar says:

          Cardio Challange it showing that needs the most motivation.

          I’d like to see a running challange, You’ve increased your endurance and distance quite a bit and been experimenting with HIIT.

          Do you use the treadmill? If so we could see who can cover the most distance for the month of December. Let me know of any other suggestions you have.

          We would have to go by the honor system or use your camera and take a picture of your final numbers after each workout.

          You name it and I am up for it.

          • IsraelNo Gravatar says:

            Sounds good. So the winner is whoever covers the most miles in December, I usually use treadmill, should we include my recumbent bike?

        • SteveNo Gravatar says:

          I’d stick to the treadmill. I really want to get that those running miles in. I will email you or comment with my results.

          We’ll motivate each other along the way. I am a fierce competitor though and I’m not going to make it easy for you to beat me.

          Saturday Dec. 1st is the official start day so get ready πŸ™‚

        • So is it official? HIIT is what I enjoy. You got my email I assume.

  3. RamiNo Gravatar says:

    I need some motivation aswell. Thats been my main problem with my weight. I need the motivation to get up at the start of the morning.

  4. PrebloggingNo Gravatar says:

    Israel keep the chin up buddy, keep setting targets and tracking your progress and I’m sure things will go a little easier.

    Do you have a training buddy ? That helps me to keep motivated.

    becky

  5. ShawnNo Gravatar says:

    I never had this problem, but then again I would always push myself on the weights till I was exhausted; a real rush.

  6. FilionNo Gravatar says:

    Fine fellow. you put a purpose itself and go to it, there are no many people to do it

  7. Allyn PaulNo Gravatar says:

    This probably sounds cache, but how about going out and helping someone in need? This time of year, we make it a point to find someone (through our church)who has trouble affording a nice Thanksgiving, and we get them some stuff.
    Maybe that will give you some feeling of satisfaction and uplifting.

    AL

  8. Congrats! 42 pounds is an achievement. Keep up the good work.

  9. BloggingIainNo Gravatar says:

    heh. Nice. Keep up the good blogging.

  10. Hey Israel,

    Having dealt with clinical depression most of my adult life, I know how you feel. Just out of curiosity, are you following a low-carb diet. I find if I try to low-carb it, my mood takes a nosedive.

    Experience has taught me that a Zone-like balance of protein, fat and carbs keeps me much happier.

    Aside from nutrition, when I was working as a personal trainer, the first thing I’d do with a client who needed to refocus was to have him/her write out a list of reasons why they started their fitness/weight loss program in the first place.

    • IsraelNo Gravatar says:

      I am not on a low card diet, so not sure if its that. That is interesting though, and I will watch out for signs of it if/when I do some low carbing.

  11. I think the horrible stuff in the life time is to reduce the weight. . πŸ™‚ thanks for this useful post. . πŸ™‚

  12. Well, 42 pounds is definitely a great achievement. However, never give up, you can always do better. I recommend connection some meditation approaches and maybe practicing some martial arts. This is definitely going to help. However, I’m not talking about dumping your gym activities :))

    Sincerely,
    Danpa Nyee Ma

  13. swanNo Gravatar says:

    I’ve heard really good things about online fitness centers, where you can get help putting together an individualized plan that will give you the support you may need to reach the next level of your weight loss venture. I found one where they offer an interesting assortment of (free) motivational and informative articles by health experts;, also hundreds of free exercises with computer modeling that require minimal equipment so you can put together your own online workouts. At such a site you can get customized advice on dietary supplementation, coaching, body monitoring devices to help you measure your progress and continuous feedback. These services are not free but inexpensive compared with things like gym memberships and specialty food programs.

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